You know that one person that no matter how hard you try you always seem to end up back in their bed? You try so hard to stop but you're so drawn to them that you can't even be around them without sleeping with them? Well, that person for me is Ian McAllister. He's our school's star pitcher and he is as cocky as they come. If you've never seen him play all you have to do is ask and he will tell you just how good he is and all his stats. He can probably spend an hour talking about himself and how good his arm is. Yeah, he's that guy. He's also my friend with benefits, has been for over a year now. I know that is an extremely long time to have a bed buddy, but what can I say, the guy is beyond sexy and I'm drawn to him like a moth to a flame. Do I know this is unhealthy? Of course I do, but there really isn't much I can do about it, he's Ian McAllister and he's not used to hearing the word no. Not that I could ever tell him no even if I wanted to. He has sandy blonde hair and the prettiest dark blue eyes I've ever seen, and if the lean muscular body isn't enough to steal your heart, he has dimples! That's right, dimples. I've always been a sucker for dimples, especially Ian McAllister's. He's also the best sex I've ever had, not that I have much experience in that department.
Not only is he mouthwatering handsome but he's a great guy with a huge heart and he's really been there for me. I was a sophomore in college and my boyfriend of two years dumps me through a text, that's right a freaking text! I mean who does that? He's a frat boy and a total jerk but I was completely heart broken. Ian was just some random guy in one of my classes that would constantly hit on me but the day after I was dumped he found me crying in the hallway and was the shoulder I cried on, literally, I cried on him for an hour, like ugly crying, and he was such a cool guy about it. We ended up skipping class that morning and he treated me to a coffee. He had told me I was beautiful and my boyfriend did me a favor, that I was better off and from that moment on we were friends, just friends. We hang out a lot and for the next two months we were besties, we told each other everything and I was falling hard for him. Then one night we were hanging out on his sofa watching some movie I can't even remember the name of and he'd leaned in and kissed me. I'm not talking about a little peck on the lips, I'm talking earth shattering, knee weakening, love at first kiss kind of kiss. We ended up hooking up that night and from that moment on I was hooked. He became my drug and I was happily addicted, before I knew it we were having sex daily, I can't get enough of him.
Do I wish he'd make it official already? Of course, I do but I'm not sure he ever will. I fell hard for Ian but I'm not sure he feels the same way or if he ever will. Ian doesn't do relationships which is the one reason I felt comfortable enough to sleep with him in the first place, I hadn't been ready for a relationship at the time and I thought sleeping with Ian would help me move on from my ex, and it worked, I just hadn't planned on falling in love with him. Now I'm stuck on this continuous loop with Ian and there's no way out, not that I want out, but I do wish we were more than just friends. As pathetic as it sounds, I've fallen in love with my friend with benefits, and I'm pretty sure he does not feel the same way. The smart thing to do would be to stop, but I've never been smart when it comes to Ian.
"You know what they say," Jessica my sorority sister and best friend says to me, "the only way to get over someone is to get under someone else."
I throw my popcorn at her making her laugh. "Is that all you got for me? Really?" I shove a handful of popcorn in my mouth. We're wearing our pajamas watching chick flicks even though it's only seven in the afternoon.
"What? You asked." She said before chewing her popcorn.
"It's easy for you, you don't get your feelings involved." Jess is the girl version of Ian, she never falls for anyone, in fact she's never been in love so she doesn't get why I'm so caught up on Ian. She rarely sleeps with the same guy twice.
"That's because I've had lots of practice." She says with a wink.
"You're so gross." I say before shoving more popcorn in my mouth.
"You're problem is you still care, Honey, it's just sex."
"Wow." I say. "Sex should mean something. It's about intimacy, trust, love—"
"You're such a girl." She throws a pillow at me nearly knocking me off my bed. I laugh and throw it back and it doesn't go anywhere near her.
"See? You even throw like a girl. You should make your bed buddy teach you how to throw if you get him out of bed long enough."
"Hey!" I protest.
"What? He should give you some lessons. It's only fair."
"You're awful and you're not helping me at all." Leave it to my best friend Jess to suck at giving advice, it's really not her fault she's never had a relationship so I can't blame her. She goes through guys quicker than most people wash their hair, she's with a different guy pretty much every night and it's okay, I still love her. Some people might judge her for it but if she were a guy she would be getting high fives and everyone would think she was awesome, but since she's a girl she's considered a slut. Jess is awesome and I don't care what anyone else says about her. She's always there for me no matter what and I'm always there for her. She's one of those people you can count on to say aloud what everyone else is thinking but too scared to say. She has no filter and nothing she says can surprise me anymore.