An open letter to my Narcissistic man.
I still remember everything from the day we met to the day you left. I remember how shy i was when you asked me out, in my heart i keep saying i have found the one. I had to admit getting to know you at first was something i wasnt found of. I still remember how caring, loving and kind you used to be. I couldn't have asked for more than a man like you in my life. Remember the first time i got my job and you were scared that i was gonna leave you for someone but i had to reassure you that i wouldn't do that and since that day i abided by my promise. I also remember how sympathic you were with me, if i get hurt you would say sorry, if i fell ill you would wish me speedy recovery, damm you were the man of my dreams. I remember the little gift u gave me, a pet, i knew you were not found of pets but just because of me you someone manage to like them, i couldn't help but smile and all happy that you really cared about me and what i love and by doing so i continue seeing you as indeed the man for me. Something happened between us, i remember when you broke up with me after i have been committed to you, saying you got someone pregnant and you couldn't go on with me anymore, i have to admit a slight piece of my heart break but i remember agreeing to never contact you again and made peace with that.few days after that i still remember getting a call from you and how sorry you were and that you would like us to try again, just because i had loved you so much i had forgiven you without hesitations and i never reminded you of the affair. Then something happened that was gonna change our lives forever, i just didn't know it was gonna change mine to worse. I remember when i told you I was pregnant and how happy you were with us being pregnant as i thought. I still remember how you keep saying i was carrying a boy and i will say the doctor told me i am carrying a girl. I remember the love you poured over to our first unborn child, how committed you where to us having a family. I still remember that we even bought a piece of land, we were ready to build our own home as a family. I remember when our son was born and my mom called you just to say you have a baby boy as you have wished for, i wish i could have hear your joyful laughter over the phone but i was too tired from theater since our baby came through cissor section. I remember when you came to visit us at the hospital, i still recall how you held our son with so much love and you didn't want to put him down. But then just when i thought my happy ending is just beginning, i had discovered my nightmare was about to start. You changed, you became everything i hated in a man, you showed me how greedy, selfish unloving and cold hearted a man can be. At first when you start with your insults i used to cry but then i get used to it, i got used to being called names by you and to be blamed for everything by you in such a way that it didn't hurt me anymore. I still remember how you made me terminate my male friends thinking i am having an affair with them, i remember how you fought with my family and your family. I also remember how many times you would tell me lets break up and i keep saying no, i thought i could love you still because to me you were my everything. I still remember how you weren't happy with where you were working, you told me you wanted to quit and i had supported you because i didn't want you to suffer further. I remember giving everything to you my body, my heart, my soul and my possessions to you, i even sacrificed the needs for our son for you. I remember how in public you would want us to appear all lovey dovey but behind closed doors you were a monster, you didn't mind abusing me behind closed doors, you didn't mind harassing me when no one was watching except our son. I saw how you couldn't love our son,but still i stayed hoping you will learn to love him. I then fall pregnant with our second born, i was so happy that it was finally a she now, we were gonna be having both genders now. I remembered how you made me suffer while i was pregnant and i almost thought i was gonna lose our daughter but somehow she survived. I remember calling you after our daughter was born and you weren't pleased at all. I still remember the last time you came to us doing the identity for our daughter, how you disowned her without hesitations. I didn't tell anyone about it though i just let it be and ever since the day u left all of us, i have been nothing but i felt a little bit at peace.its been a year and some months now without seeing you and i have to admit I now don't have suicidal thoughts i once had when i was with you,i guess by then i had fallen into depression. I now live my life happily with our kids and one day i promise i would tell them all about you because you are their identity. And one last thing, thank you for making me see how strong i am alone and how protective and loving i could be over myself.
From
The woman who once loved you.