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Gods' Chatroom

Gods' Chatroom

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David Wang, who returned to his hometown with humiliation and became a security guard, mysteriously became a member of the gods' chatting group one day. He snagged a Virility Pill. Uh, although I don't need it, it can be used to trick others. A Beauty Pill? Seems like this is a precious item requested by the Fairy Chang'e. What, you think I’m only good for grabbing red envelope bonuses and making chit-chat? I also run some businesses when I'm free. Monkey King: Bro, pay more attention to the development of my Mountain of Flowers and Fruit, will ya? Queen Mother: Great Immortal, is the Peach Crisp ready? Fairy Chang'e: Great Immortal, what about the packaging I asked for?... Sure, sure. Sitting in his chair, snacking on watermelon, tallying his returns and corresponding with a goofy grin, was David Wang.
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At the entrance of the upscale Dragon Mansion in Yang City,

David Wang, dressed in a security guard uniform, stood gazing blankly at the ostentatious car driving away. He felt somewhat disoriented, eventually only able to force out a bitter smile.

His girlfriend of one year, surprisingly, had hooked up with the rich second-generation bloke, Li Ran, from the residential area. The ridiculous part was that he had only just found out about this.

Moreover, he had found out all due to them flaunting their relationship in front of him.

"What's wrong with being poor? Yuxi Yu, I hope you don't regret this," he mumbled.

Feeling heartbroken, David Wang walked into the break room. His colleagues upon noticing his state, did not try to stop him.

Ding.

Ding.

...

Inside the break room, David Wang was just about to lay down when his phone began to buzz with urgent alerts.

"Damn! Who keeps adding me to these groups? It's so annoying."

He pulled out his phone, seeing another group that he was mysteriously added to only made his already sour mood worse.

'"Fairy Chat Group', huh. Why don't you call it 'Presidential Conference Room' while you're at it."

Upon reading the group's name, David couldn't help but retort even if he found it somewhat amusing shortly.

'Taishang Laojun invites the Seven Fairies into the group.'

The Supreme Old Lord invites the Sun Star Lord to join the group.

The Supreme Old Lord invites the Thunder God and Lightning Mother to join the group.

Below are a series of invitation prompts.

Chang'e, Barefoot Immortal, Thousand Miles Eye, Marshal Canopy, Nezha, Hou Yi...

What a bunch of jesters, aren't they? These names are too bizarre.

David Wang can't help but think to himself.

Just as David thought, even though these individuals joined the chat group, none spoke a word.

Seems like another group filled with idle members!

Ding.

However, following this thought, a vibrant red envelope sprang up on the screen, sent by the Shunfeng Ear.

David Wang paused, then reflexively clicked on it.

"Gone!" Within a mere second, the ten red envelopes were all taken. Are these people operating at the speed of light?

David Wang was dumbstruck.

"And what the heck is this 'Three Realms Hearing Aid'?"

David Wang was more and more confused, it seemed like he had never heard of such a product before?

Smooth Ear: A small token of my regard, I hope you esteemed beings won't mind.

Nezha: Hmm, you're quite diligent, lad. You show promise.

Nine Heaven Profound Maiden: Why hasn't the Taoist shown signs of motion, hand out the red packet, hand out the red packet.

Two cute emoticons

Erlang Shen: I am starving, @Grand Supreme Elder Lord

Grand Supreme Elder Lord:

Three sweat emoticons

Alright, the Taoist shall give.

Ding.

It was another large red packet, genuinely distributed by the Grand Supreme Elder Lord.

Despite the peculiar group of people, this time David put all his might, the moment he saw the red packet, he clicked on it sharply.

Ding dong.

He snatched 2 virtue points.

"Virtue points? What is that? Can it be eaten?"

As David was perplexed, the chat group already exploded.

Nezha: The old man is stingy, I only grabbed 10 virtue points.

Erlang Shen: 5 virtue points! My Sky Howler is starving.

Marshal Canopy: I didn't get a single point, you guys figure it out.

Mother of Lightning: With those stubby fingers of yours, just forget it.

A series of scornful facial expressions

Marshal Heavenly General: @Lei Gong, control your wife.

Nezha: If it were me, I wouldn't put up with it.

Mother of Lightning: Little Nezha, you shouldn't cause discord and disrupt the order of the divine realm.

"A group of idiots, and they call themselves celestial beings!"

Below is a group of jokers given divine aliases, happily chatting and joking around.

Seeing this, David Wang drew a conclusion in his heart and set his phone aside.

It seems that this chat group is just a bunch of clowns. Even the red envelopes they send are these odd merit points.

Can these be used as money?

Ding.

However, just as he set his phone down, the bell rang again.

"Annoying, a bunch of ill-fated kids."

Feeling impatient, David Wang pulled out his phone intending to leave the group, but after a few attempts, he found he couldn’t quit at all.

"What the hell is this?"

His confusion grew. Did he encounter something eerie after his heartbreak?

Wu Gang sends a friend request to you.

As David Wang has grown puzzled, a message appeared before him.

"Wu Gang? Is that the guy who was chopping trees on the Moon?"

Confused, David Wang clicked on the [Accept] button.

Wu Gang: "Dreamy Immortal, I've got pills for energy return, strength boost, and bone enhancement, along with the

you know what I mean emoji

. They are all just fifteen merit points each. Guaranteed you'll crave for the second pill after trying one, and after that, you'd want a fifth."

Wu Gang: "Guaranteed fair and square, quality is assured. Essential exquisite goods for your home or travel. Particularly the latter one, the ultimate guarantee for marital bliss!"

Wu Gang: "What are you waiting for, Immortal? If your heart is moved, it's time for action.

A series of hopeful eyes

"

Dreamy Immortal: "..."

A group of idiots, running door to door advertising. To this, David Wang can't be bothered to respond.

Wu Gang: "Does the Immortal find anything unsatisfactory?"

Wu Gang asked in a confused tone, which instantly made David Wang lose his patience.

Dreamy Immortal: "Why do you guys insist on conning and tricking people, becoming the scum of society? Tell me, can you live with this? Look at yourselves, it's criminal that society tolerates your kind."

Releasing this series of messages, David Wang felt utterly liberated.

These fools mired in mud, they need a wake-up call like the one he just delivered.

This made David Wang quite pleased with himself.

Wu Gang:

Expression of cold sweat

Immortal, you are taking it too seriously. I, Wu Gang, assure you that it's definitely not sham medicine that I am selling. It would be unjust to defame an innocent person. Plus, what's this "society" you speak of? We rely on the Celestial Court for our sustenance.

Ding.

A message appeared, immediately followed by a large red envelope.

Wu Gang: Immortal, please don't be angry. This little gift is just for the sake of making new friends.

At the same time, at the other end of the phone, Wu Gang sullenly stared at his phone's screen, silently contemplating.

This Immortal has quite the temper!

Having said that, Wu Gang disappeared withdrawing from the chat.

"At least you have some conscience."

David Wang nodded in approval and promptly opened the red envelope.

Received a Bone Fortifying Pill.

Would you like to extract it?

Extract.

David Wang hit the [Extract] button, curious to see what kind of chaos these people could stir up.

A flash of golden light came and went in an instant, and the next moment a thumb-sized medicinal pill appeared in David Wang's hand.

"Oh my gosh! It's haunted!"

Looking at the sudden appearance of the golden light and the inexplicably appearing elixir, David Wang was startled and abruptly threw his phone onto the bed.

However, soon a look of shock appeared in his eyes. He picked up his phone and entered the chat group.

"Could these people really be immortals?"

He couldn't believe it, but the disbelief was promptly followed by ecstasy.

So, he really has met the legendary immortals, and this group of immortals seemed to be... humorous.

"It seems Heaven does not want me, David Wang, to live a mundane life."

Looking at the elixir in his hand, a blazing fire instantly ignited in David Wang's eyes.

Thump.

At that moment, a muffled sound came. The door to the break room was kicked open.

"David Wang, stop playing dead in there and get your ass out here now."