On Alyssa’s fifth birthday, she expected it to be like every other birthday. Her father always spoiled her rotten, he didn’t say no to anything. Her brother would let her hang out with him all day. Her birthday was her favorite day of the year, she thought this was going to be the best one yet. She decided to make her brother take her to the river swing and play all day. She arrived bright and early at the table waiting for her birthday pancakes. They were her favorite, cinnamon and cocoa. She sat down and everyone seemed sad. “I’m only five” she joked. It was at that moment, her life changed forever. Her parents explained that they were splitting up and they decided to separate the children. It was the worst birthday, she thought. What she didn’t know, was far worse was yet to come.

Alyssa was born on a hot spring morning. The first five years of her life were filled with love and joy. She spent most of her days frolicking in the meadow and annoying her brother. She lived with her older brother, Logan, and her mother and father. Her parents had a rocky relationship even before she was born. They were not bonded lovers but had two amazing children together. Her father was offered a new position within the pack that changed everything. They decided to end things and go their separate ways. He would take 8-year-old Logan and Alyssa would live with her mother. The day, she and her mother left she thought would be the saddest day of her life. She truly had no idea what the future held for her. Her brother held her tight, sobbing. She may have been a pain, but he loved her more than anything. Her father hugged her one last time and loaded her in the car. Her mother drove off pack land and entered the human world.

The first few years were hard being away from her family and pack. Her mother worked hard, and she did the best she could for her daughter. She was never the greatest mother, but she tried. Her mother met a human man when she was 8. He was ultra-religious who had three children of his own. His wife had passed away, although no one ever spoke of her or what happened. Alyssa's mother fell under his spell, and nothing mattered over him. At first, Alyssa thought it would be ok. He was strict and mean, however, she adored having siblings. She was happy to be part of a family again and believed things would only get better, they just needed to spend time together.

Logan often thought about his sister. He wondered if she was ok and if she even remembered him. Her father was always sad but refused to talk about it. He and Logan never spoke about her. Logan often thought about trying to find her, but his father had forbidden it and he was not only his father but his alpha. He could not defy his leaders' orders. Logan spent many nights, laying there thinking about his sister. The sadness was overwhelming sometimes. He knew he should long for his mother as well but oddly enough he didn’t. She wasn’t a bad mother, but she wasn’t a great mother either. It was too painful for his father, and he had accepted his choice. He often spent nights wondering about his daughter, imagining all the wonderful things she was experiencing. He created this amazing life for her and how this was the best choice he could have made. “A girl needs her mother” he always said to himself. It was the only way he could survive and accept letting his little girl go. Every year on her birthday, he would make a wish to the moon god to keep her safe.

As time went on, things only got worse for Alyssa. Her stepfather was strict with his children but saved the worst punishments for Alyssa. He was cruel to her and enjoyed punishing her. It only got worse, especially once her wolf emerged. Being a wolf only angered him more so he would often chain her up or perform exorcisms to rid her of the beast. He began to beat her every day. He forced her to wear silver bracelets, locking the beast inside. The day her wolf arrived, was supposed to be the best day of her life, however, her wolf emerged damaged and out of control. The silver bracelets burned every second they were on. The assaults on her human self had broken her wolf before it even came into this world. Alyssa had her first transformation at 14. Usually, the pack takes the newly transformed to the woods and guides them. It is a bonding ritual that allows for healthy wolf development. Her mother was no longer a wolf at this point and her stepfather was so enraged, he tried to kill her. She was forced to run away into the woods, alone. This resulted in a murderous hunt in the woods. She killed many innocent things that night, she watched as her wolf had no self-control and the taste for blood only grew. Finally, after witnessing her wolf's destruction, she returned home. Her stepfather chained her up for weeks and beat her repeatedly. He was trying to kill her wolf but no matter what he did, the wolf survived. Alyssa even managed to heal with the silver bracelets on, it was a slower process, yet she should not have been able to do it at all. Many times, she begged for death, but it never came.

The older she got, the more intense it became. Her first heat came when she was 15. every wolf, rogue or not, came for her. If they were unmarked, they came to find her. Wolves 15 miles away could smell her. She found a cave, deep underground the only place she was safe. She had to remain there till her heat was over, alone. Her heat came on every 3 months, and she would disappear for over a week. The beatings were worse when she came back, her stepfather discovered new ways to torture her. He said it was in the name of God but he just enjoyed hurting her. When she turned 16, her stepfather found a new way to punish her. He decided she was out of control and needed to be taught to be a good wife. He would never be able to marry her the way she was. She needed to learn submission. He started to have his way with her to break her so she could be marriage material. Eventually, he had his son enjoy her company as well. He never wanted any part of this, but his father forced him. The repercussions from disobeying were too frightening to not comply. He didn’t enjoy what his father made him do to her, but he feared his father more than God. She never really held a grudge against him, she knew it was never of his own volition. He would be as gentle as he could unless his father decided to watch. She hated when he watched, he made sure it was painful. The first time he did it, the brother cried, and she consoled him the best she could. At this point, she was used to having no control over her own body. She felt worse for her stepbrother, who she knew would be scarred for life. Her wolf at this point was locked in her most of the time but utterly insane.

Her stepsisters were kind when their father was not around. They cared for her the best they could without getting caught. They were always nice and cried at her pain. She enjoyed it when they were alone. They would take her bracelets off when the father was out of town. They would allow her to heal and transform in the woods. She was never a threat to them just anything that moved in the woods. The brother didn’t have a taste for violence either, so he never told what his sisters did. She was just trying to make it to 18 and she could be free. Part of her hoped to make it out alive and the other part hoped she died soon. The pain and torture, she didn’t know if there was anything after that. Would she even be able to get away? Her wolf was too dangerous to live amongst anyone. She planned to find a quiet wooded area and live there forever, alone if she had to. She wanted to go to college however she didn’t think it was in the cards. She was a good student despite her situation. She had early acceptance to several colleges. It was one way she could get out of the house, but she wasn’t sure it was safe. All she knew, she had to make it to 18, and then she could leave. One day a wrench was thrown into her plan that would change everything.