Author: © Mariam Ramírez - All rights reserved.
Warning: The following novel is protected by various databases and copyrights granted by SAPI. Its sale, reproduction and distribution is totally prohibited. If you have any questions or suggestions, you can communicate directly with me. Hugs!
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Dedication:
Loving someone is one thing. That someone loves you is something else;
but that the same people whom you love, love you…
It’s everything.
Dedicated to my beloved twin: Charlotte Ramírez.
To my mom for pushing my wings.
To my favorite psychologist: Evelyn Escudero.
And to my dearest Friends and readers:
Alejandra Eng., María F. Mogollón, Elihú Juárez,
Neiva Antúnez, Claudia Alvira y Florencia Abasto.
Without all of you, Nuance would not be what it is, thank you!
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Epigraph
“In itself, homosexuality is as limited as heterosexuality: the ideal would be to be able to love a woman or a man, any human being, without feeling fear, inhibition or obligation.”
Simone De Beauvoir.
“I’ve had to fight to be me and to be respected, and carrying that stigma, for me, is a pride. To be named lesbian. I’m not boasting, I’m not proclaiming it, but I’m not denying it. I’ve had to face society, with the Church, which says that homosexuals are cursed… is absurd. How are you going to judge a being that was born like that? I didn’t study to be lesbian, not taught to be like that. I was born like this. Since I opened my eys to the world. I’ve never slept with a man. Never. See what purity, I don’t have to be ashamed… my gods made me like that.”
Chavela Vargas.
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Preface
Hi, I’m Samantha Landers and I want to tell you a bit about what this whole story is about. To start, I am a teenager. Yes, this is narrated by teenagers and we show ourselves as we are: volatile, temperamental and extremely complicated. But do you know when our world gets complicated and turns upside down?, when we fall in love. Here the bad joke begins!
Out of all the romanticism and plan of “fairy tales” that we have devised since we were little when we talk about love, of those romance from books that we want to live, we learned to put aside that in this field nothing is rosy, there is much work to be done, but on the other hand there is nothing previously written that sentences it. Love itself is difficult to explain, but in adolescence it is really a drama to live it.
Let’s begin by explaining that we wisely classify it as a double-edged sword; just as you are born through it, you can die from it. It’s relative, moreover, it all depends on which side you are on: whether the lover or the beloved; They don’t always correspond and say that there is usually one who always loves more… or who loves with fear, which is worse.
It’s ironic, of course, sometimes it comes under the facade of the love of your life while you meet their beautiful and perfect partner. But that is not all, the worst comes when, due to social prejudice, that love must be hidden. In front of the conservative society you must disguise it as friendship so that they don’t persecute you, point out, and even attack you as if their lives were perfect; and that is how human beings are: we criticize the lives of others without even stoping to see if ours is an example to follow.
To you, rotten society, I want to propose the following: to anyone who wishes to criticize my path, I lend my shoes. I fall in love with the person, not with their sex… and what do you fall in love with?