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Endless Desires

Endless Desires

Auteur:ChristineWalter2

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Introduction
Like a road that had twists and turns with no end... so were her desires... Stephanie wanted to be a normal person. To live a normal life just like her fellow teenagers. But she's from a Christian family and over protective parents that there are certain things that are considered as taboo when done. She tries to avoid them all and be that good girl that she's meant to be. But what happens when she's tired of abiding the rules, when circumstances forces her to break all those rules? Will she be the same again?. How will it all turn out? How will her life be?. Join me in Stephanie's journey and learn all about her insecurities, all that she faces and all that she has to abide with.
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Chapitre

  All I ever wanted was to live like them... I wanted to go out like them and do the things that they did, feel the way they did but all that wasn't possible.

  Why?

  Because.... because my parents weren't like theirs. You know the all carefree and don't care so much parents?. My parents weren't like that!. They we're so into good morals and over protecting me... So I just stayed still and watched from the sidelines my friends

well, they called themselves my friends though I doubted a lot

enjoy their lives, being happy and bragging about it.

  I actually didn't care about it, I didn't care about them and all that they said. I didn't care them calling me a "nerd" or the "bookworm"

I was very good in studies. I did pretty well since I used my time to read unlike them

actually, I didn't Care at all and when they pushed me too much I'd fake out a story which later made me feel bad. But they wouldn't know, right?.

  They wouldn't know if I was telling the truth or not, right?.

  Well, guess I was safe then!.

  Anyways, today was not a good day. I was in my first year in highschool. Very fresh and still new just from primary level. The mathematics assignment that had been left wasn't easy at all and I was trying to concentrate on it, to complete it before the deadline approached which was on the following day. I was in a boarding girls only highschool so I was spending the whole of my semester in school until the holidays came. Never had I been far away from home like this, my father had intended to enroll me to a day school instead but his boss interjected that a boarding school was better especially for girls. Father had agreed half heartedly, he paid the fees, bought me the school uniform and before leaving, he and mother left me a five hundred shilling note for my pocket money which we all knew wouldn't be enough if I was going to spend two months in school before the mid term break.

  I had said nothing.

  Mother had asked but Father had answered with, "She's too young to handle a lot of money. Let her know how to manage that first then I shall think about adding her some more".

  I said nothing. I was just thirteen years almost fourteen and already in highschool.. A boarding school and my Father thought that I was too young? Then, he wouldn't have let me come here then. Oh yeah, I know you're wondering how comes I'm in highschool with such an age, well, I'm from Kenya and our school thing isn't similar to that of the States or the other very well developed countries so yeah I was now here in boarding school, very homesick and already counting down the days to going home soon.

  "You know, the first day that I had seen you, I thought you we're in form two". I told Trizah.

  Trizah sat at the front desk in front of me and we we're also dorm mates. We we're in Form One which was the first class in Highschool, followed by Form two then Form Three and you completed your highschool by going to Form Four where at the end of the year you we're to do a national exam which determined if you we're qualified to go to college or universities. College students were thought to be the ones who hadn't performed well in their final form four exams while the university students were thought to be the ones who had performed extremely well and we're expected to do the fancy courses. I hadn't thought of which one I would go but that would be determined by my final exams, right?. But I didn't think I would pass... In my final primary exams I hadn't performed well but that wasn't my fault, I had been ill, I hadn't studied well and so I failed which made my father be disappointed in me.

  Trizah chuckled as she turned full bodied to face me. She was dark chocolate skinned, tall just like I was. She also was slimmer and had longer hair than most girls in our class.

  "Really? Do I look that old?". She teased.

  I smiled at that. The few of the genuine smiles that I had smiled the past few weeks we had been confined in this school.

  "No that's not what I meant". I responded.

  "I know. You're not the only person to tell me that but I don't mind". She answered before turning back to face in front to get her work done.

  "I heard there's a journalism club here. I'll join it". I found myself say. I always found things easy around Trizah. I don't know why I trusted her like this but I took her as my best friend, I like her.

  Trizah turned to look at me again with a raised brow. "You want to become a journalist after school? Or are you doing this just for fun?".

  "I want to be a journalist or a news anchor after school". I replied as I smiled at her.

  "It suits you. You're pretty good in English". She complimented.

  "Thank you".

  "But are you aware that you're going to pay for that club?" She asked. "They want a hundred shillings. How much do you have as your pocket money?".

  I hadn't told her what my parent's had left for my pocket money but if I took a hundred out of the five hundred shilling note I had, how would I sustain myself for the next more weeks that we're yet to come?.

  "Oh don't worry about that". I quickly dismissed the topic and she turned her attention back at her work.

  Journalism was my passion, it was what I had dreamt of for so long and my parents were already aware of it. My mother had approved of it whereas my father didn't care much all he wanted was for me to attain good grades. That, I wasn't sure of, I wasn't sure if I could make it and get those good grades my father wanted me to maintain. Guess, it wouldn't hurt to deduct that a hundred shillings from my pocket money, right?.

  "Stephanie stop day dreaming!". Trizah chuckled as she slapped me on my arm playfully. I smiled back at her while the bell for break time rang and most girls from our class ran out to get to the school's canteen to buy snacks.

  "Lemme go. See you later". Trizah said then left as well. I couldn't just use my remaining cash for snacks like them who got the cash they wanted from their parents unlike me. I decided to pass my break time by dozing on my desk. That was the only way.

  •••••

  So far, I had despised highschool. The food was little and undercooked, the dorms were cold though we were almost twenty girls in there, our dorms which was commonly known as "Jerusalem"

was close to the toilets and the bathroom where we all bathed without hiding a thing

wasn't the most comfortable dorm there.

  I remember that early morning as usual we were to wake up three every day which I still wasn't used to. I seriously wasn't a morning person but it was one of the school rules to be punctual and on time.

  I groaned as the bell signifying we should wake up and get out of bed rang again.

  "Stephanie. Wake up or you won't get space from the Kenyatta grounds to bathe on". Latifah one of the Form Two's in our dorm and also my dorm mate, shook me awake.

  Kenyatta grounds was where we all bathed. You know, since we were all girls there was no privacy so we just all bathed there without hiding anything.

  "Let me sleep a little more". I whined trying to pull the two thin blankets that I had over my head.

  "There's no time. You'll be punished". She muttered as she pulled back the blankets, the cold brushing over me harshly. I got out of bed and took my towel and bucket following her to the Kenyatta grounds to fetch water for bathing.

  We bathed using extremely cold water, outside in the open grounds that made most new students groan and complain but there was nothing we could do. This was our lives now and nothing could change unless your parents were those rich and carefree then you'd be lucky to be transfered to another better school.

  "Don't worry you have three more years to go through this same routine". Latifah said as she took my bucket to fetch me water. She was older so she could cut the line and fetch water from any of the taps that she wanted.

  "Three years?. That's a lot. You're way more luckier! You got two more years unlike me". I complained as my bucket filled up and we went to the furthest corner of Kenyatta grounds which was a bit dark so little privacy was present.

  "I know. You don't know how eagear I an to leave this life. The sooner I live the better". She said as she stripped off of her night dress, hanging it on one of the hanging lines that were behind us. I did the same though the cold was numbing my hands... No my entire body.

  "Well. I envy you!". I mumbled as I bent to start bathing. This was a hard life!. I was also looking forward to leaving it.