Have you ever wish to be with someone who doesn't even know you exist?
"He's so handsome!"
My friends giggled over a photo of a popular actor as they watch a new series starring Leo.
"I know right! I want to marry him."
Everyone in the world has someone whom they admire. May it be your long-time best friend, co-worker, an idol, celebrity, or simply someone you walk past on a street.
As for me, I fell in love with an actor who has a screen name, Leo. It was just a simple admiration at first because of his talent to act, dance, and sing flawlessly... until I met him in person during his meet-up event and that's when our fan-celebrity relationship status changed.
I once wished to be with him someday when I was only a fan. I know it would be impossible because he doesn't even know I exist, but destiny seemed to help me reach my soul mate.
Recalling the day I was drawn out from reality by his stares, his eyes were as alluring as the stars and his smile always lights a beam in my chest. That day, I knew my heart has been captivated by him alone.
"AHHHHH!" Samantha squealed, grinning. "I'm so in love with Leo!"
"If only I can meet him!" Emma yelled.
I know, girls. I know. He's good-looking, has a good heart, acquires a very likable personality, so what's there to dislike? I've been with Leo for almost three months now and everything seems to be working smoothly.
The three of us studied together to prepared for the exams tomorrow. It's our 2nd monthly exam and I'm so nervous already. Samantha and Emma just watch a movie starring Leo after cramming to relieve their distress.
They're a die-hard fan too just like me before. And every time they mention Leo, giggled over him, or simply compliment his looks it only gets harder for me to hide my secret from them because I also want to express how crazy I am for Leo.
"Why aren't you interested in Leo?" Emma turned to me. "Like oh my gosh, he's such an angel! A hot one!"
"I'm not into actors, celebrity, or whatever..." I reasoned.
As much as I want to scream and proudly declare to the world that Leo is my boyfriend, I'm afraid we decided to keep it a secret from the public. I didn't want to ruin his career and he didn't want to let me get bash by his fans for loving an ordinary girl like me so we both agreed.
It does feel like a betrayal to my friends but I have no choice. Even my parents and elder sister know nothing about my love life. All I want is a peaceful relationship with Leo and I think that would be enough.
"Emma, look," Samantha said. "Leo is in a love team with Scarlett Stone!"
"Her and Leo is a perfect fit!"
"What?!" I lash out. My body moves at its own pace to sat between Samantha and Emma. With eyes fixed on the television, the fear to lose someone close to my heart embraced me. Leo's arms were wrapped around Scarlett's waist while looking intensely at her. He looked happier, more lively, and attractive. Focusing into his eyes, it was not the same stares he used to give to her female leads, it was further intimate.
"Just what happened right now?" Emma said, weirdly looking at me.
Holding on to my emotions, I rush upstairs and lock my bedroom. I grab the comfiest pillow I could reach and embraced it.
No, not Scarlett Stone... I know he had many female leads before but a love team? A love team lasts for years! What if he forgets about me and fell in love with Scarlett? She's elegant, rich, famous, a millionaire - everything I'm not...
Slow footsteps began coming closer to my room and it was my friends.
"Marinette, are you okay?" Samantha whispered. I can see their worried face from the back of the wooden door. I walk closer to the door and placed my hand on the doorknob to open it but suddenly walk one step away from it.
"Sorry, girls. Can we talk tomorrow?" I muttered, looking down to the floor.
"Sure, we're always here for you, Mari," Emma reminded. "We'll be heading out now."
I can't say a thing to my friends, it wouldn't be right if I did. I'm in the middle of breaking out at this present but I need to handle this heartache alone.
Even though I'm Leo's girlfriend, I always tend to think that there are so many girls giggling over him... that I can easily be replaced by one of his fans or any other female leads on movies he's been with... neither can I have him alone. He needs his fans, acting is his passion, the entertainment industry is his career, and I have no right to stop him just for my selfish desires.
As I stare from the outside of the window, tears welled up in my eyes for the second time. He's the moon I can't reach, and I'm just one of his stars admiring him. Soon enough he'll be able to forget everything about us and I'm afraid I will never know when will that be.
"Psst... Mari, baby," a familiar voice called. It was soothing and charming as it breathed out my name. Not for a second did I hesitate to open the windows. Looking down to see who it was, my heart throbs faster than usual. He flashed me his soft smile and waved the single rose in his hand sweetly like a baby holding a lollipop. "I love you."
The doubts inside my heart vanished in thin air. He once promises to give me a rose every chance he gets to see me and up until now he still hasn't forgotten to bring me one.
How can I resist a man like him? A consistent man like Leonard?