Silently letting my sobs out. I sat in the corner of my room. It’s big and spacious, and yet I feel like I’m caged. My heart hurts so much every time I

Think about it.

Are they out of their minds?

Another tear escaped. After all those years of being loved, I just realized that I was just an item they loved and adored. After that, they will make use of me using the advantage of raising me.

I feel so betrayed. How could a parent tie their child to a man she doesn’t know? It’s not the 19’s anymore..

I don’t see a reason or need for me to marry a man I don’t know. I’m well.

educated and independent.

Perhaps it’s pure business.What more could be the reason except business?

I can’t believe they can trade their children for money! I’m not an object to be.

given-taken

Anger rushed through me as I thought of how my parents think that they can get me easily.

My fist clenched as I grasped onto my night gown.

I won’t let them control my life. Never.

What I hated the most was being controlled. And I know that I would never ever be.

I stood up from the floor and hastily ran to my closet.

I grabbed my duffel bag and the nearest clothes that I could get.

At this point, my impulsiveness is taking over, but I don’t care. I want to get out of this place before it’s too late.

I’d rather be homeless than be married to a crazy 50-year old man!

I checked everything I needed to take because I won’t ever come back here.

My things were scattered everywhere as I was searching for every spot, so I

I won't leave anything valuable. A duffel bag is too small..

Another bag won’t hurt right?..

Not caring anymore, I packed another bag and changed my clothes.

Finally done with packing, it’s now the time where I will need 100% luck. I opened my windows to see if anyone would see me.

My room is on the 2nd floor and I can not risk using the front door. That is pure dumbness.

The cool breeze sent chills down my spine. I once again looked down at where I needed to land.

As long as I land without a broken bone, it’ll be good. I slowly threw my bags down and still being cautious if anyone was around.

All of my braveness washed out and I was left with my fear. I certainly do have a fear of heights.

Breathe in, breath out.

Whoosh

As long as you don’t break a bone, nothing is going to hurt. I chant in my mind.

Waaah, I could be brave and scared at the same time. That is how fast my mood changes. Huhu.

Attempt one. I took a deep breath and positioned my right leg at the window. But a minute passed and I was still in that position. Arghh, how do I do this??

This is so frustrating, ughh.

Just get over it. It’ll be worth it rather than marrying a weird man.

"For the sake of my future!" I closed my eyes and held tight to the window.

Whatever I land on, please don’t be something hard. I prayed in my mind.

Without thinking a word, I let go of the window and fell.

I hugged myself as I was scared. Good thing I landed on a bush, so my butt isn’t hurt.

A smile formed on my lips.

Just being out feels so free. The cool breeze welcomed me. Engulfing me in a tight hug as I take a step towards my independence.

Wow, big word, ‘independence’.

Actually, I was never allowed to go out if it wasn’t about important things.

And I think every girl is also.. right?

Freedom is a big word. It’s not like I don’t have it, I just certainly can’t use it. And this arranged marriage is the way for me to claim it.

I ran my eyes down to our house where I spent all my life.

I will definitely miss this place. I pout. My butt hurts.

Well, buckle up big girl. You are now set up for your adventure of being free and independent!

Deep inside, I am sacred—petrified. I still don’t know how the whole world goes. I can not control the

people there. I need to work hard for myself. I can’t depend on anyone else except myself.

Yeah, that’s why you should hurry your ass because the sun is about to set and someone is gon na catch you!

For the final time, I stared at our house as a tear escaped from my eyes.

mother and father, I hope that you can understand that I don’t want to marry someone I don’t love. I still wish the best for both of you. Please take care of each other. I will forever keep in mind that you loved me even if you are now selling me off. Hoping for the best

And with that, I took my bags and fixed my cap as I ran away from the place I once called home.