“I’m bored Astri, bored … bored … bored. We never do anything fun around this place anymore,” Lenin complains, rolling himself around on my pillow, while Jetli’s contemplating joining him or not.

I bite my lip and look around the chamber, thinking he’s right to some extent. It’s been two weeks since the duke of Rivenna appointed me as his assistant, and nothing’s happened since. We haven’t even had a chance to meet in order to discuss my new duties and responsibilities. Not to mention, I haven’t seen Thayer around much lately, so it’s been frustrating to say the least.

Today I officially reached a new level of boredom, so much so that I started helping the maids in the castle do the folding and ironing. This was supposed to be my new start in life; the duke was meant to be my mentor, and he was supposed to teach me everything he knows about developing my magical abilities. Instead, I’ve been staying in my chamber all day long with nothing to do. It was much more fun working with Emilia–at least I could always find something to do there.

Jorgen’s been avoiding everyone in the castle–his family and even his loyal advisor, Thayer. He doesn’t eat in the main dining room anymore; he has his food brought to him on regular basis.

“How about we go for a walk? And see if we can track another bear in the forest,” I suggest, wondering why I’ve been feeling so depressed since I left my old life behind. At the end of the day, I got what I wanted; I’m not living in that hell hole of a basement with my aunt and uncle…

I became the duke’s assistant after I participated in a strength and magical challenge, competing against other shifters in the city. Over the span of a few weeks I needed to prove I had the necessary skills in order to show the duke I could not only fit in, but was strong enough to accomplish any task he set before me. In the last final task I returned as a hero, rescuing him from a bunch of wild shifters who were keeping him hostage in the Decaying Mountains. The contest was dangerous, and I nearly died, battling another shifter who went after me with a knife and magic. He had been charmed to kill the “Wyvern creature”. To this day, I’m not positive who placed the deadly spell on Elijah. Sebastian claimed it was Jorgen–now I know differently. It was probably Sebastian’s cheating arse. Too bad beetle nut took away his memory–if only he didn’t try to kill me.

Unfortunately, nothing that day went according to plan. Jorgen let himself get captured by the leader of wild shifters, Bratlav. He was certain one of the contestants would come to his rescue, regardless of what was going to happen in the meantime. Jorgen lost his ability to shift, lost his magic, while I stood hidden in the mountains–I didn’t even attempt to help him when Bratlav performed the “cutting of the mage” ritual.

I only entered the contest because I was convinced Jorgen III was the mage who killed my parents. My plan was perfect; I meant to get close to him, then stab him in the back when he least expected it. And that’s exactly what happened–except revenge isn’t as sweet as they say, especially when you exact it against a perceivably innocent person. All you feel is overwhelming guilt and the need to make things right again. If only I knew then what I know now. I still need answers, but getting them is another matter altogether.

Everything happened as planned; the leader of the wild shifters did all the dirty work for me and I eventually rescued the duke after he was locked in a cage–powerless–once the ritual was complete. Once we returned to the castle, I was crowned the true winner. I celebrated, but deep down I didn’t feel the burning satisfaction of victory. The final nail in my coffin was a conversation I overheard between two guards just outside my chamber.

They talked about a mage who had been hunting Wyvern shifters for years, and they were convinced he was from the Asian World, so it was never Jorgen who tried to take my life. That night I returned to my chamber, thinking I made a terrible mistake, standing passively by, not reacting when Bratlav ripped the duke’s dragon from his very soul, stripping him of his magic forever. Losing his dragon, his ability to shift is worse than death. Jorgen’s no longer a mage and I meant to expose him, but so far I haven’t been able to go through with the second part of my plan. How can I now–after what I’ve learned? What kind of person does it make me? He’s probably an innocent man–a man I allowed to suffer. The only proof I had was my vision and something from a unicorn’s white magic–nothing concrete. Although my visions were never wrong in the past, the words of the guards hit too close to home.

Jetli pulls a face and shakes her head. Obviously she doesn’t like the sound of going out for a hunt.

“Walking around the forest is boring Astri, and we have to fly. After too much time our wings would start to hurt. I want to do something fun–how about we play hide and seek in human populated areas? It was so funny the other day when we scared that delivery guy,” Lenin says, giggling to himself. Then he shoots up in the air, looking very excited about the idea.

I exhale sharply, and scratch my head thinking about Jorgen again. I get it, he’s depressed and lost without his dragon, but the way he’s behaving is drawing far too much attention to himself. People in the castle might be used to him not being around, but sooner or later someone will figure out something’s wrong. The duke’s a role model to the people of Rivenna, and I have to pin point the real identity of the mage who killed my parents and scarred me for life. For weeks I was convinced it was the duke, now I’m not so sure.

Since I overheard the conversation in the corridor, I haven’t been able to sleep, filled with guilt and despair. My revenge was meant to be satisfying, but instead I hate the fact I may have made the biggest mistake of my life. I don’t feel angry anymore, my parents have been dead for years. I don’t remember them, but I need answers. There are too many holes and too many inconsistencies in what happened all those years ago.

“I should go and speak to Jorgen. He’s supposed to be training me, maybe he’ll give me something to do,” I say, getting up and grabbing my collection of knives. The duke must realise I’m not jumping for joy now that I’m his assistant. He’s been neglecting his responsibilities for too long. It’s time to get him out of his funk.

I’ve even been avoiding going to the forest lately, and it’s really not like me at all. I should be happy, at least now I don’t have to worry about my aunt and uncle, but this new life’s turned out to be a total disappointment so far. I’m bored out of mind and I’m learning nothing new, except how to sleep in.

Jetli shakes her head, like she’s trying to tell me not to bother. She’s sensing there’s something wrong with the duke. Everyone in the castle’s going about their business, but mages must be suspicious Jorgen’s changed, they just aren’t saying anything. The Pixies have no idea Jorgen isn’t a real mage anymore, or that I’ve been forced to keep my mouth shut.